No one likes hearing Quinton "Rampage" Jackson talk more than the man himself, and if you expect him to do anything besides “tell it like it is”, you are following the wrong fighter. Rampage has probably been saying ridiculous stuff since he was knee high, but only since about 2001 have we been able to hear it for ourselves. Most of it is playful (author note: like the time he told me on Twitter my mom was so fat, she used the Octagon as a playpen), but some of it is just Rampage being crazy. Enjoy some of the best of the worst Rampage jokes.




1. Rampage comments about the first time he heard about mixed martial arts:

“Well the weird thing about me is that I grew up fighting and one of my friends introduced me to it (MMA) and I was like, 'Whoa, you mean I can beat up white dudes and not go to jail?'"

2. Jackson never shied away from his perpetual need for expensive things and joking about having to pay for his many children:

"Yo man, I need to get paid. I got a ton of kids. I have like a kid every 30 seconds. Wait, what time is it? Damn, there's another one. Told ya."

3. During the run up to his fight with UFC Hall Of Famer Chuck Liddell. Rampage couldn’t help but hope for the best for the Iceman:

"I don't want to kill him. It's a sport you know, I just hope he survives."

4. During the promotion for the announcement of his fight with Marvin Eastman:

"I love Marvin, he's like a brother to me. But right now it's time for some black-on-black crime."

5. On the quiet crowds in Japan:

"In Japan, the crowd is quiet. This one time I heard a cute girl fart in the second row."

6. Rampage was very clear as to what he was going to after fighting Wanderlei Silva:

"When I beat Wanderlei, I'm a take his belt, pull his pants down and spank him for bein' so ugly."

7. Rampage talked about a new bobblehead the UFC tried to make:

“They made a Tito bobble-head but that shit wouldn't bobble, it would just fall down to one side and stay there."

8. Rampage had a very unfortunate nickname for Darrill Schoonover that stuck. Schoonover was a cast member on the The Ultimate Fighter, and Jackson relentlessly made fun of his physique. He asked the camera:

"If you had them titties, would you be happy with yo'self?!”

9. There was all kinds of anger and trash talking happening in the run to the Jackson vs. Rashad Evans bout, and the pair had this odd exchange:

Rashad: "I'm gonna treat you like a sucka."
Rampage: "Well then go on, lick on me then."

10. When an interviewer asked Rampage if he had a crystal ball, how would his fight look:

"I don’t have a crystal ball, I only have these two balls."

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